The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid-term exam. The answer by one student was so profound that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is of course why we now have
the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
which states that gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is
compressed, or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following :
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they
are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state
that if you are not member of their religion, you will go to hell.
Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not
belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to
Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number
of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's
Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to
stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls
are added.
This gives two possibilities:
(1) If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
(2) If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year, that "...it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you",
and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having
sexual relations with her, then No. 2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure
that
Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.
The student received the only "A".
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